"Yes doctor, he's very devoted and is doing his exercises several times a day..."
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'Chair de poule' is the French equivalent of goose bumps. Playing on the word chair/chaise, this one is not happy about being plucked and now someone has already taken her place.
'Froid de canard' is a French description when it is bitterly cold. Clearly, this poor chap is going to have to do better than a few droopy flowers to warm this lady's heart.