Nothing is better than a communal preen. Followed by a dustbath and a snooze in the shade.

Three jealous guys with beautiful cars but the lad with just the bike has the beautiful girl.

A stolen kiss under a bunch of grapes, amongst the vines.

Porc de France. ‘Porc’ is pronounced with a silent c and rhymes with Tour

Apples baked on a bed of wafer-thin pastry, generously sprinkled with armagnac. All agree that it is delicious, but is it called a Tourtiere Landaise, or a Croustade Gasconne?

Never, ever tell anyone where you found the mushrooms.

Avian flu is called 'grippe aviaire' in French. But a few too many drinks and it could become 'grippe à bière' !

Les plombiers Landais.  (The plumbers of Les Landes)

Plombiers sounds almost like palombières, which are the huts used to hide while hunting wood pigeons (palombes) in Les Landes.

This piggy is doing her best to pop the cork.

Old shepherds never die, they just get a stairlift.